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baby jesus is nobody​’​s baby now

by Julia Jacklin

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1.
she lost the baby the house nearly burnt down baby jesus is nobody’s baby now watched him pick the pack of smokes out of the bin this time of year has always been so hard on him last christmas at my aunty’s house I tried so hard to make my uncle shut his mouth grandma cried, can't this wait drink a cup of juice, try to celebrate the family asked me to sing them all a song get up in the lounge room while they keep the tv on pick a fun one, everybody claps plates of cold cuts tremble in their laps watch me go to bed alone this year there was someone I wanted but, they’re no longer here grow up girl, it’s good for your health to go to bed sometimes simply holding yourself she lost the baby the house might still burn down baby jesus is nobody’s baby now wanna be there to pick her up off the floor but I’ve never had to reach this far down before this christmas at my aunty’s house I’m gonna try so hard to open up my mouth say it loud, and hope it’s true next year will be much easier on you

about

2019 was a pretty rough one for my family. I was touring the whole year carrying a lot of guilt for not being able to be at home. Singing super sad songs every night was a blessing and a curse depending on the day. I was imagining Christmas as being this time where we all came together again and took a collective breath but then the bushfires hit and my family live in the country so it was a direct threat. I was living in Melbourne, still pretty new to it, and wasn’t able to go home, the roads were blocked and my family were being evacuated periodically for a month. At one point Melbourne was blanketed in smoke from the fires, the sun was this menacing red, it felt apocalyptic and pretty hopeless. I wrote this in my room looking forward to 2020, hoping it would be a reset of some kind lol.

credits

released December 8, 2020

co-produced by Julia Jacklin and Blain Cunneen
engineered by Blain Cunneen
mixed by Tom Healy

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Julia Jacklin Sydney, Australia

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